Of Silence and Secrets

I stopped writing again.  You knew that, of course, but what you may not have known is that whenever I stop writing, it is because I am so very, very bad at keeping secrets. We had many this summer. A  baby on the way and a possible move meant that I could not think of one single thing to tell you about that didn’t involve gestating or selling/buying a house. Multi-tasking is, after all, a complete lie straight from the pit. That is never more true than the days where a baby is stealing all of my food and brains. And so I was silent.

Sorry and stuff.

BUT!  NOW!  Let me fill you in (mostly.  I’ll attempt to not over share, but you know how that kind of escapes me sometimes).

Baby #3 is supposedly due to enter this world on February 14.  I am thinking sooner.  It was originally the 11th (according to my calculations – and you know how awesome I am at Science) but then an early ultrasound got all holier than thou about the size of the fetus and now?  Now I have three extra days tacked on there.  Whatevs.  I bet he/she comes whenever God wants him/her to anyway.

And speaking of all that he/she him/her nonsense – I think we might wait to find out.  You have an opinion about this, I am sure.  Most everyone hates the idea, probably because we hate waiting for people who take too long to wrap a burrito at Chipotle.  Waiting never feels like fun.  For all of you, I am waiting to find out until the baby comes so that you can learn to be patient.  For the rest of us, I am wondering if not knowing will make me less ‘connected’ to this baby. I know there is technically an umbilical cord keeping us connected, so that’s all just crazy baby lady hormone mumbo jumbo. Was that true for you?  Did it matter at all?  Are you just tired of me not telling you secrets?

And then, the other news was moving stuff. We almost did.  We got very, very close.  We staged our house. We spoke with realtors. We got on air planes and we decided we couldn’t go.  We have some amazing relationships here that ultimately trumped the awesomeness of the offer. So we are here.  Here to help with planting a church.  Here to keep investing in great people. Here to let our kids get loved on by our sweet friends.

My summer of uncertainty officially ended when the Huskers won that game on Saturday. The weather turned. The air feels crisp and it was time to tell.

The belly is growing as fast as these two munchkins are.

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  1. Kim, We feel connected to all five of ours. We didn’t find out until their birthday. Well now that I think about it Tansy does prefer Tesa over me. Maybe because Tesa still supplies the goods. I am not that observant either, I didn’t realize that number three was on the way until two weeks ago. Congratulations! As for the church plant, we haven’t decided yet. It will probably depend on the actual physical location.

    • Tawnya
    • September 4th, 2011

    Loved your post….been thinking of you all a lot. Praying for the babes and exciting things happening for the people of CBC!

    • Tami Zielke
    • September 4th, 2011

    Well, I can only speak from the “old days” about finding out what the baby’s gender is, but it was very exciting to have the Dr. say “It’s a ________!” Well, in our case, of course, it was “girl!” All through both pregnancies, Greg referred to the growing bump as “the boy.” He’d rub my tummy, “How’s the BOY today?” He grew up with 2 brothers and his dad was an only child, basically. He asked me one day, “What will I do with this baby if it’s a GIRL?” He was worried about not knowing how to interact with her without it involving throwing a ball around! LOL It was no problem, as both girls have a great relationship with him. They basically just have to bat their eyes and say, “Daddy…..” and he’s a marshmallow! People have bonded with their babies for hundreds of years without knowing ahead of time! I’ve thought about whether I would want to find out if I were in the childbearing stage….and have come to the conclusion that I’m not sure….
    If you DO decide to find out, Mackenzie told me about what some people that she knows have done to reveal the gender. They take the sonogram to a bakery, such as HyVee or whatever, but they don’t look inside the envelope or let the tech/doc tell them the results. The bakery makes a cake with blue or pink food coloring on the inside and then frosts it neutrally. You have a party with family and/or close friends and cut into the cake, and everyone finds out together. Scary, but kind of a cute idea….. Well, thanks for letting me reminisce……and BTW, I’m glad you’re not leaving.

  2. I don’t know why you think you’re no good at keeping secrets…I seem to recall that you kept #1 & #2’s names a secret until they made their appearance. We are so excited about #3!! Still can’t believe you became a mini-van mom, but if you’re excited about a mom-mobile, I’m excited for you. ;o)
    Love you lots & hope you guys continue to feel confirmation from the Lord about your recent decisions. He is faithful.

    • Carole Brooks
    • September 5th, 2011

    Oh Kim! I am so excited for you! Congrats on the baby! And I’m so glad you’re writing again…your posts make me happy:)

  3. i am over the moon excited that we get to keep you! i was just positive that it was going to happen. you would become southerners and i was pretty down about the giant void we would have felt.

    as for peeking or not, i can’t compare the two. i can only say that i have cried tears, buckets even, over the joy and love i already feel for this little person growing inside of me. and the mystery of who he/she is just makes me giddy, not go crazy with impatience. i suppose you may end up feeling differently since you’ve been through two and have known.

    love you guys. and excited for all that’s ahead of you!

    p.s. i thought you could shut that lady on the iPad up. or did you decide to keep her around? she’s never messed with us.

  4. Congrats! That’s awesome! I have no opinion on waiting vs. not waiting, which is just great cause you don’t need the opinion of a “never-given-birth-so-what-right-do-you-have-to-a-voice-anyway” person!

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